I Am Overcome

“See you in heaven my dear, rest in peace”.

Fireworks trigger my memory and take me the outset of the nightmare where everything is grey; giggles disappeared, clothes are muddy, schools are lifeless and nature is colorless. I do not remember seeing a bluish sky where I had been; even the sun holds different color there. Am I cursed to be born there? Or is it just the will of the unfair and cruel fate? I tried to look on the bright side but there was no brightness at all. I tried to make lemonade out of lemons but there was no tree at all. Is there any slim chance to be saved, or is it pointless? Do I need to sign a peace treaty with my dreams to stop dreaming about them?

Sadly, many of the things that must be changed in the world are still a reality today; hatred, contempt, submission and superiority complex. Am I exaggerating or the world is becoming sick? I wish I had been a death row prisoner. Thus, I would be liberated from this ashen cold cage. The blood runs cold when it comes to my mind how my dears faced the ugly death. It will take blood, sweat and tears to omit these bad memories. They etched on my mind and I am looking for the day they will be dim.
Wars, child abuse and being orphan, these words must break the previous statements down for you if you are confused.

Am I insane? Am I bad in expressing my feelings? Am I dead? What I am talking about here? Was the first quotation directed to me?

You never know.

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